Yesterday started off as any other day. Alarm went off at 5am. Got a short 20 minute workout in. Woke up my husband and then woke up the kids. 

That’s when the day went a little wonky. 

My 10 year old is going through the wonderful years know as puberty. And some days that can be…uh…challenging! 

My heart goes out to all you mothers that have yet to experience this tender age and to all of you mothers that have and your children are still around, God Bless You! You are Amazing! Can you do it again for me?!? 

By the time I had dropped off my oldest to her before school program, my mind was reeling with,

 “I can’t do this!” 

“I am failing as a mother.” 

“What was I thinking having kids?” 

“Can I keep her in room until she graduates?” 

“I am obviously not cut out for motherhood…”

Anyone else ever had those conversations roll through your head when your child is acting up? 

Then dropping off my toddler at daycare, they had this large sign that stated to enjoy your children each day as they are getting older every day and you will not have this moment again. 

After the morning “discussions” I was perfectly okay to not have that moment again.

As these thoughts were going though my mind, the Lord gently gave me this verse.

Children are a gift from the Lord. They are a reward from Him. 

-Psalms 127:3

I love my children more than I can say, but in light of the circumstances that just happened, immediately, my frustration rose up. Blessing? Are you kidding me? Reward? What did I do to deserve that this reward made to feel like I am the scum of the earth by one I love so much? I don’t want this reward! Take it back!

Got a little rebuked at that because are we not God’s children? And how often have we lashed out at our Heavenly Father? How many times have we given Him attitude when we don’t get our way?  I know I have. And yet He still loves us with the love of a father and still considers us His treasured masterpiece. (Ephesians 2:10)

So yesterday afternoon, picking up my children, I braced for more attitude from my oldest. But when she saw me, she came bouncing over with a big grin on her face and gave me a huge hug. 

God made us so wonderfully and beautifully unique. There is no parenting guide that will fit for every child. Parenting has struggles! It is hard! And there will be times when you feel like an absolute failure and haven’t a clue what to do. 

One of my favorite movies is, Mom’s Night Out. If you haven’t seen it, I highly recommend it as it captures how mothers feel at so many different times during the movie.

During one such scene, the main character, Ally, feels like she is failing everyone (know the feeling?) especially as a mother. The guy with her, Bones, simply looks at her and states,

“Ya’ll spend so much time beating yourselves up. I doubt the good Lord made a mistake giving your kiddos the mom he did.”

That’s it! God doesn’t make mistakes! He entrusted my girls to me just like He has your children to you because no one else is as suited for that role as you are. They truly are His gifts to you!

Even when they are throwing a fit on the kitchen floor. When they’re rolling their eyes at everything you say and storming off in a huff.  Even during those moments where all you want to do is cry in your closet drowning in a bag of chocolates, remind yourself that this too is just a moment. 

You are not a failure. 

You are not inadequate. 

You are right where God has called you to be and He is guiding your steps and helping you through all the struggles and joys of parenting. Trust in Him because His parenting guidebook is the best one to follow. 

One thought on “My circus…my monkeys…err..blessings

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s